The way it should be
by 42Lia
Summary: Spain is dating Romano. All is well. Until he suddenly finds a peculiar photo album with a bit too many pictures of a blond pirate in it. And it's signed ... Portugal. He should have known. From rosy and peaceful, Antonio's life is going to fall down a drain of buried memories. He may hate his brother but sometimes, he wonders what he'd do without him!
1. Chapter 1 Missing pages

**Missing pages**

"Roooomaaaaa! Don't leave meeeee! I'll be sooooo lonelyyyy!"

"I'll be back in a week, you bastard! You'll last until then! Ciao!"

The Italian nation shut the door behind him, leaving the Spaniard alone in his house. Antonio sighed and tried to occupy himself. Three hours later, Spain was staring blankly out of his window, being bored and depressed.

"It's so boring without Lovi … What can I do?"

Suddenly, Antonio had a bright idea … well, brighter than usual.

"I know! I'll clean the house completely! That way, when Romano gets back, the house will be all nice and pretty for him!"

And so, Spain started an integral cleaning of his house. By the end of the day, Spain was half done but was feeling a bit tired and decided to have a rest. As he dropped the dust clothe he was using to clean his library, his eyes fell upon an old photo album.

"Uh? I don't remember that album …"

It was old, with a crimson cover ornamented with golden designs. Inside it, the last two pages were missing. But Spain was too busy looking at the other pages to notice. The photos were ones of him during his conquistador period. There were also pictures of France, Prussia and his brother Portugal.

"Aaaaah, those were the days … before that English bastard ruined everything! Oh! There's a picture of him too! Hm? Why is there a heart next to it? Uh? I didn't draw this … hey, there's another picture of Arthur here and with another heart … that's strange … and why is 90% of this album only covered in pictures of England?! … I wonder …"

Then a memory struck him. He looked onto the back of the first cover and saw a small note from Portugal.

_Here's a little present for you Brother, to make you remember the day Arthur kicked your ass (hi hi)!_

_Honestly, you should thank me! I had trouble getting those last pictures and I'm sure you'll like them! You can hide it from the others but you can't hide it from me!_

_I know you're sad of losing your armada to him … I know you won't be able to fight him anymore … and I know you'll need time to sort out your feelings … But one day, you'll thank me for having given you this album. Trust me. Alright, that's all I had to say! Adios!_

Spain looked at the note with anger as he remembered how he had felt when he had received this album. He had buried it in his library until he completely forgot about it! But wait … What did he mean by 'the last pictures'? Spain checked but the last two pages were missing. What had he done with them? He couldn't remember! Spain tried to ignore his growing curiosity but in vain, there was no way he was going to let this go until he found the missing pages. And now, Spain had completely forgotten about Romano and his boredom. In fact, he was excited! This was like a treasure hunt! And according to João, he would like the missing pictures! Maybe they're pictures of Romano when he was little? Although Spain already had countless of those!

Now, where could he have put those two pages?

Spain went through all his old things and ended up causing a bigger mess in his house than there was before he started cleaning. So much for tidying up! Eventually, Spain found an old coffin in a corner of his cellar. But the damn thing was locked. Great! Now he had to find the stupid key! Who had the stupid idea of hiding those pages in there?! Where's that key?

He looked all over the place again and gave up, exhausted. It was late and he was tired. Maybe he would find the key tomorrow?

Spain dragged himself to his bed and he was still holding the album. He browsed through it, absent – minded. His eyes stopped each time he came across a photo of Arthur. It pissed him off a little that the blond pirate looked so good and imposing … wait! What? Spain shook his head and closed his eyes, ignoring this strange thought. He fell asleep holding the album.

The next day, Antonio finally found the key although it took him the entire day to find it. However, he felt a bit anxious at opening the coffin and decided to wait until tomorrow. Instead, he went out in town for some fresh air and a change of mind.

It was a busy evening in Madrid as always … so many people … so many … Spain walked alone in this big crowded city. He liked having people around him but … he didn't like to remain alone in such a big crowd … ignored by all … he felt unwanted and unimportant …

Of course, he knew that wasn't true but … the feeling still lingered. There was something missing in his life. What was it? Of course! It had to be Roma! He's feeling all weird like that because Romano's gone back to his home for a week! That was it!

Spain's grin rushed back onto his face as he decided to enjoy himself while Romano was away. He went to a popular night club in the centre of Madrid where young people all gather. He needed to forget this whole thing! He needed to forget about this album, forget about the missing pages, forget about Arthur, forget about his loneliness and forget (temporarily) about Lovi!

Antonio danced, flirted and drank all night long without a care in the world! As he was walking back to the bar and leaving the dance floor, Antonio noticed a familiar figure among the people at the bar. He was too far and it was too dark to see the man's face but … Antonio was almost sure that he recognised Arthur. No! That's impossible! Arthur shouldn't be in Madrid! He should be in London! And was that even Arthur? The figure was similar. He had the same height, the same messy, golden hair, a creamy white skin, slender body with feline movements, same arms, same legs, same upper body, same … WTF?! What was he doing? Analysing some random guy and comparing him to Arthur? And how was he able to tell what Arthur's arms and legs looked like? This was crazy!

Antonio slammed his head against the bar table and when he lifted it back up and looked at the blond … he was gone. There was no trace of 'Arthur' anymore. Had he left or had Antonio only imagined him here?

Back home, Antonio fell asleep, completely wasted and in a foul mood. All night, he had nightmares of a blond man with emerald eyes smirking and walking away from him as a winner. Soon, the blond was out of sight and Spain was all alone with his broken armada.


	2. Chapter 2 Break up

**Break up**

Spain gazed at the falling rain out of his window. Romano was sitting next to him, reading a book. It has been a month since Spain discovered the album and he still hadn't open the coffin in his cellar. The key was tied around his neck and never left him. He could feel the weight of it like it was a burden or even a curse but he was afraid of unlocking secrets that it was wiser to forget. He should forget but the key was there to remind him all day long and all night long his nightmares where haunting him. They were more frequent and always the same. Arthur looking down on him and walking away, leaving him behind, alone.

Spain still didn't understand why he was suddenly having those dreams but it caused him a serious lack of sleep and it showed. He was less cheerful and less excited than usual and he had a tendency to daydream. Even now, he was staring at the drops of water hitting the glass of the window. A sigh escaped his lips and attracted Romano's attention.

"What is it now, tomato bastard?"

No response. Spain didn't even seem to have heard him. That pissed off Romano a lot! And he came all this way to stay and Spain was ignoring him?

"Hey bastard! Answer me when I ask a question! Damn it! Stop ignoring me!"

He punched Spain in the face. The Spaniard snapped back to reality and looked at his lover with a surprised expression.

"Lovi? What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? I should be the one asking that! You were ignoring me while I was talking to you, bastard!"

"I was? Oh, so sorry Lovi! I didn't mean to! It's just that I've been having this thing on my mind recently and those weird dreams and I don't sleep well and I have weird thoughts and …"

"Okay! Okay! Chi! I get it! So … what's on your mind? Why are you acting so strange since I came back?"

"It's not you Lovi, it's just … I've been having those dreams …"

"What dreams?"

"Nightmares … from when I lost my armada …"

Lovino's face softened and he placed a consoling kiss on Antonio's lips. Antonio didn't kiss back. In fact, he didn't react at all. That was strange. Usually, any time he got to touch Lovi's lips, he would jump on him and his body was on fire. But this time … he didn't feel anything. The kiss wasn't unpleasant. Far from it! It was a very skilful kiss! It just … didn't arouse him … at all … not even in the least … … that was strange …

"Don't think about it anymore! It's over! It's time to move on!" Lovino said while caressing his lover's cheek lovingly.

Yes, it was over. Time to move on. Move on … but how? How did he move on? Antonio had thought he had finally gotten over this whole thing and his relationship with Lovi had been the best thing that ever happened to him! So why were his memories haunting him again? Why was that green eyed devil lurking in his mind when he should be enjoying Lovi's rare show of affection!

The Italian heaved himself on top of the Spaniard and started to kiss him passionately. Antonio felt the tasteless lips and a feeling of disgust overwhelmed him. He closed his eyes and that's when he saw a pair of shining emerald orbs. Suddenly the lips kissing him weren't tasteless anymore. In fact they were sweeter than any nectar he had ever tasted! And softer than the softest silk! His heart was pounding and his body was on fire. He kissed back. He kissed back like his life depended on it. He heard a soft whine but ignored the complaint and kept pushing his lips on the other's. Then, as he was wrapping his arms around the other he felt two hands pushing him back. His heart stopped. No. Not yet. More! He needed more! He couldn't stop! Not now! Not yet! Not again! Don't leave! Antonio became more forceful and held the other man tighter and closer. The smaller man finally managed to break their kiss and he yelled.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! I said I wanted to stop! You're being too forceful! You never were like this before! What is wrong with you, damn it?!"

Antonio's hands dropped and his body froze. This wasn't the voice he was expecting to hear. For some reason, the voice he was waiting for was deeper, harsher, with more intonations and a touch of sarcasm in it, less whiny, less high pitched, less crying and sobbing, less childish. Antonio's eyes slowly opened and he felt disappointment overwhelm him as he saw Lovino's flushed angry face. Somehow, he expected someone else's face. He expected blond hair, a snow white skin and emerald, teasing eyes. Antonio shook this thought away and smiled apologetically to his ranting lover.

"Sorry Lovi. I guess I got carried away."

Lovino eyed him suspiciously. He knew that Spain would never get carried away like that. Spain had always stopped when he requested him to. But this time he ignored his signal, and instead became even more aggressive. Spain had never been this aggressive before. So why now? What happened?

"Antonio, answer me honestly. Was it me that you were kissing right now?"

Antonio stared at Lovino with a blank and unreadable expression before sending him a blinding smile.

"Of course, Lovi! Who else would I have been kissing? Weren't my lips on yours?"

"Don't play dumb Antonio! You know what I mean! That kiss was nothing like before! You've never been so aggressive and forceful like that with me. And I noticed that until you closed your eyes, you hadn't returned my kiss. Why?"

"What do you mean, Lovi? I was just surprised and …"

"No. Surprise would be an excuse for the first kiss which you didn't return at all! That was the second kiss. You know as much as me that it wasn't because you were surprised."

Antonio didn't answer. He didn't know what to answer. He honestly didn't know why he reacted that way. All he knew was that he hadn't been kissing his little Lovi. Lovino decided to try another test. He leaned forward and started to trail kisses down the Spaniard's neck and down onto his collar bone. But Spain didn't react. He didn't even shiver. Romano looked up and saw a confused expression on his lover's face.

"Well?" he asked defiantly.

Antonio could only shrug.

"You are joking me! Are you saying you didn't feel anything? Nothing at all?"

"Lovi, I …"

"That's it! I'm done! If I'm not satisfactory enough for you, Antonio, then I'm leaving!"

"Lovi! Wait! I didn't mean to …"

"You didn't mean to what? You didn't mean to lose your love for me? Or did you never fall in love with me in the first place? _That kiss_! You never showed ME that much passion! I don't know who you were imagining in my place but you gave that person a better, more loving kiss than you ever gave me! If I was just a substitute then I'm done! I want to be loved by someone who cares for me! Go fuck yourself, you lying bastard!"

And with that, Lovino shut the door and left. Antonio stood there, unable to move or think. Slowly, he moved back to his seat and dropped himself on the couch. He sighed loudly and looked out his window. The rain had stopped.

"What have I done?" Antonio mumbled as he slowly drifted to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3 Phone crisis

**Phone crisis**

Today was a European Union Conference. Spain was walking towards the meeting room in Paris with a depressed look. Every other nation looked at him in both shock and astonishment at seeing him in such a state. They were so used to his cheerful personality that most didn't imagine Spain to be able to feel depressed. They had all heard of Spain and Romano's break up from three months ago. Romano was doing fine, only he was even grouchier than usual but Spain had been depressed and exhausted ever since. His nightmares had gotten worse and he still didn't understand why he kept seeing Arthur's figure walking further and further away from him. He didn't feel sad at all from losing Romano. Not one bit, which made him feel very guilty. They had been going out for five years and he felt nothing after their separation? What kind of twisted heart did he have? He had pondered upon Romano's words of never actually loving him. Now that he thought about it, he hadn't been drastically in love with the Italian. Sure he liked Romano very much but … he never did really think of him as a lover until Romano had confessed to him and asked him out. On an impulse Spain had agreed and he had enjoyed their relationship but … each time it felt a bit off. Like he was having an illusionary relationship. He had ignored this little voice in him telling him that it was wrong. He had ignored it … and it came back to haunt him with those visions of Arthur. If only he hadn't found that stupid album, none of this would have happened! Thank you so much João! That was the worst present ever! He still hadn't looked at the locked up pages in his cellar and the key was still hanging from his neck. He could feel its weight tempting him, pushing him to open the coffin but ignored the urged. Damn João! Damn album! Damn missing pages! Damn! Damn! Damn! And most of all …

"Damn Arthur." Antonio mumbled as he sat down in his seat.

"Exactly why 'damn Arthur'?" a familiar voice asked next to him.

Antonio's heart skipped a beat and his eyes slowly turned to meet bright emerald, glaring ones. Arthur raised a questioning eyebrow, his body tensed and ready for a fight. Antonio just stared at him. It had been a long time since the last meeting and he was eye devouring Arthur like a hungry wolf. The Englishman was taken aback by the lack of response and the unusual stare Spain was sending him.

"Spain, what were you saying about me?" he asked with a threatening voice and his glare hardened.

Antonio savoured the sound of his voice. Yes, that was the voice he had wanted to hear. For so long.

"I'm sorry. I was just talking to myself. You don't have to concern yourself."

Arthur's eyes widened. Antonio was _apologising_ to him? And telling him not to concern himself? Seriously? Maybe he's sick? Or maybe Arthur misheard? Maybe the Spaniard got abducted by America's stupid alien friend Tony and this was in fact a clone of Antonio!

"Spain? Are you feeling alright?"

"Yes! I'm fine! Thank you for asking!" Antonio grinned.

Now Arthur was scared. Spain _thanked_ him?! And not only that, Antonio had been depressed ever since he came to the conference and now, suddenly he was back to being a chirping bird! The blond shook his head and decided that if Spain was back to being his normal self then there was nothing to be worried about. He turned back to prepare his notes and didn't notice the staring eyes of Spain on him.

The conference went well. It was always easier when they had a European Union conference than a World conference. For a start, it saved them from having America's stupid hero speeches. England walked out of the room while talking with Portugal, unaware of Spain following them. His phone rang and he sighed as he saw America's name on the identification number.

"What is it Alfred?"

"Hey! Arthur! How did your boring European conference go?"

"It went fine now cut the crap and get to the point! What do you want?"

Portugal snickered at the annoyance leaking from England's voice. America pouted over the phone before answering.

"I just wanted to ask you if you want to come over! You don't have to be so mean!"

"Come over? What, you mean now?"

"Well duh! When else?"

"America …" Arthur sighed. Oh oh! Trouble. When he heard his nation name Alfred knew the answer he was going to get.

"Wait! Please! I really wanted to see you! And … and … I … I wanted to tell you something too! Something important!"

Arthur's curiosity was peaked and he waited for Alfred to continue. Hearing nothing, his anger level rose back up.

"Well? What is it that is so fucking important it can't wait until I'm home?"

"It's just that … I wanted to tell you in person … not over the phone … I asked Mattie about how to say this and he said it had to be face to face."

"Face to face? What kind of crap is that? Unless you're going to tell me that you're dying, I really don't think a face to face is needed! Do you know how many times you asked me to come over for pointless reasons? I am not doing another 12 hours flight for no valid reason! So hurry up and tell me what's wrong before I lose patience and hang up!"

João was laughing hysterically while Antonio watched the scene with growing interest. Arthur waited for Alfred to stop his mumbling over the phone and he finally got an answer.

"I … I wanted to tell you that … … … I love you …"

Arthur's jaw dropped open. João looked at him questioningly and Antonio came closer.

"I … I'm sorry … can you repeat that please? I'm afraid I might have misheard."

"… You heard right. I love you."

"America … this joke isn't funny at all."

"It's not a joke! I love you, Arthur! And I don't mean brotherly love! I mean real, actual love! I … I dream of you all the time! I get all hard when I think about you! I always want to sit next to you! I feel angry when someone else talks to you! I want to be with you all the time and that's why I always call you over for meaningless reasons! I love you! I've loved you for so long!"

"For so long …? Exactly how long?"

"… Since you first found me when I was small …"

Arthur dropped his phone. His face paled by the second and he was trying to catch his breath. João picked up his phone while Antonio rushed to support Arthur.

"Hello? America? This is João, Portugal speaking. It seems Arthur is a bit shocked from what you two talked about. Um … I think you should call him back later. I don't know what you told him but he's now as pale as a ghost."

"Is he alright? I didn't mean to upset him! I just needed to tell him! I had to tell him that I love him! Please! He's not mad at me, is he?"

João too was now stunned. Alfred had confessed to Arthur? No wonder Arthur was so shocked!

"Um … I don't think he's mad at you … I just think he's in a state of strong shock … you should wait until he calls you back."

"Oh … Ok then … maybe I should come over to see him?"

"NO! That wouldn't be a good idea! Give him time to accept what you told him."

"Ok … I understand … I'll wait for his call."

"Goodbye America."

João turned to see his brother (when had he gotten here?) supporting a wide eyed, pale Arthur. They both guided Arthur to Antonio's car and they drove off to the hotel where all the nations where staying at.


	4. Chapter 4 Brother's argument

**Brother's argument**

Antonio kept staring at his ceiling. He was back in his house in Madrid, the conference was over. And he was even more depressed than when he left if that was possible. João had told him the nature of Alfred's call and why Arthur had panicked.

Spain felt a rising anger in him and he struggled to keep all thoughts of murdering America away. He hadn't talked to Arthur since then and in fact, Arthur had gone back home the next day, missing the last two days of the conference. João had covered for him saying that he was feeling sick. Antonio felt jealous of his brother for being so close to Arthur. He knew they were only friends and had been in an alliance for over 700 years but … he just felt so much anger and jealousy.

Those nightmares of Arthur leaving him were becoming more and more persistent. He felt so anxious that his heart could stop beating any minute. He knew now. He understood why Romano's kiss had felt tasteless. He knew who he had imagined when kissing. He knew why he was having those strange dreams. He knew why he had murderous intentions towards Alfred and a venomous jealousy towards João. It was all because of Arthur. The hearts next to Arthur's pictures in his album … João had put them there … and now, Antonio knew why. He knew what his brother had meant. He was amazed though at how his brother had seen through his feelings so long ago while he only realised it now. He was in love with Arthur and had been for centuries.

Why? Why was he only realising it now? When it was too late? Arthur has probably already agreed to go out with Alfred! He knew Arthur had strong feelings for the American. Everybody knew.

Antonio screamed in his pillow and cried his heart out. It hurt so much! He didn't care about the missing pages of his album anymore. In fact, he wanted to forget ever finding this album that caused him to realise his feelings. He had lost everything! He had lost Romano, he had lost his heart and now, he had lost Arthur.

Antonio heard his phone ring. He ignored it but the ringing didn't stop. Who could be phoning him so persistently? He grabbed his phone and shouted as he answered.

"WHAT? I'M BUSY! GO FUCK YOURSELF WHOEVER YOU ARE!"

"I'll remember that, now if you can stop your sulking for a minute and actually listen to what I have to say, you wouldn't be so depressed!"

Antonio recognised his brother's voice and he groaned.

"What do you want …?"

"I just phoned Arthur to check on him. I thought you might want to hear about him."

"Why would I be interested in this bastard?"

"Oh? Weren't you the one worrying yourself about Arthur after Alfred's confession? You were all over him! Don't deny it, brother! I know you better than you know yourself! I bet you only just realised your true feelings!"

"… … I hate you …"

"Good! That makes two of us! I don't know what happened but for you to give up on your little Romano, something must have burst your stupid bubble."

"I … I found … your album …"

"Hm? What album … Oh! That album! I knew you'd get it eventually! Took you long enough! By the way, did you like it? I took good pictures of Arthur, right? I put a few of you and your pals to make sure you didn't throw it away! The last pictures of Arthur were the hardest to get! But they were worth it! I can imagine the face you made when seeing them!"

"I didn't."

"What?"

"I didn't see them. I locked them up somewhere in the past and I still haven't unlocked them."

"You … what? But why?"

"I don't want to see it anymore. I don't want to hear about Arthur anymore! If I had known this would have happen, I wouldn't have even looked at that album! Damn it, João! It's all your fault!"

"Why are you getting angry like that? Aren't you happy?"

"Happy about what? Romano left me! Arthur is going to go out with Alfred! And I'm all alone and miserable! What is there to be happy about?"

"… … Who told you Arthur was going to go out with Alfred?"

"It's obvious he will! He loves him! Everybody knows that Arthur cares about Alfred!"

Antonio heard his brother chuckle over the phone and it made him even angrier.

"Antonio! Everybody knows that Arthur loves Alfred but as a brother! Not as a lover! You're such an idiot!"

Antonio's tears stopped and his attention was now solely focused on the voice on the phone.

"What?"

"That's why I was phoning you. You didn't even give me a chance to tell you what happened. Arthur phoned Alfred back yesterday and rejected him. He said something about already loving someone."

Antonio's heart dropped down to his feet. Arthur already loved someone? Then he was still doomed.

"Hey, Antonio? You're still there? You're still alive? Hey!"

"What …?"

"Ooooh! What's with the depressed voice? Shouldn't you be glad that Arthur rejected Alfred?"

"He rejected him for someone else. Whether it be Alfred or anybody else, it's still the same to me."

"You're the biggest idiot I have ever seen! Who said Spain was the country of passion? The guy who did is a bigger idiot than you! Where is all that passion of yours, idiot?"

"What's the point …?"

"The point? What's the point? The point is I haven't told you who Arthur loves!"

"Oh … so now you're going to torture me by making me hear about who Arthur chose?"

"… Do you really picture me that cruel? No, I don't know who Arthur loves! He only told me that he had someone in mind and has had for many years maybe even centuries, who knows? I don't know who it is Antonio."

"Then why are you still bugging me?"

"For goodness' sake, Antonio! Do you even have a brain?! Go pack a bag and fly to London now! Arthur's still feeling a bit down so go cheer him up!"

"Why should I …"

"Because you love him! There shouldn't be any more reasons! Who cares who Arthur loves?! For all we know it could even be you! Though I seriously don't get what's so attractive about an idiot like you! And even if it's not you, who cares? You're fucking _Spain_! One of the sexiest and hottest countries in Europe, if not the World! Did you even _try_ to seduce Arthur, you dumbass? Why are you giving up without even trying? Romano? Who cares about that whining Italian! Arthur's much more attractive than him and he has a better personality by far! And right now, he's just as depressed as you are so go cheer him up! Where's that passion you keep bragging about? What's it for if you can't even confess to Arthur? Damn it Antonio! Get in the fucking plane already!"

Antonio's brain went blank. Strangely enough when it started working again, he was standing in front of Arthur's doorstep. João's speech seemed to have awoken something in him. Antonio fidgeted before ringing the doorbell. A blond man answered the door and looked at him with astonishment.


	5. Chapter 5 Making up for lost time

**Making up for lost time**

"Spain? What are you doing here?"

Antonio shrugged, unable to answer. Arthur just shook his head in disbelief before letting him in.

"Come in."

"Thank you."

"Do you want something to drink? Beer, wine?"

"Wine would be nice."

Arthur nodded and motioned Antonio towards his couch.

"Just wait here for a second. I'll be back in a tic."

A few seconds later, Arthur was back, holding a glass of red wine and one of whisky. Antonio eyed him as he sipped his golden drink while sitting down. Arthur was a bit perplexed at seeing Antonio visiting him and was wondering the reason of his presence at his house.

"So … why did you come here?"

"… I … I wanted to see if you were feeling better …"

"Didn't João phone you? I already told him that I was fine."

"He … he said that you sounded depressed …"  
"… Then he made a mistake. I'm really fine. I was just a bit shocked at hearing Alfred's confession. Honestly, I never even thought of something like that. The thought of him and me … it never crossed my mind. I mean, I love him but as a brother. I can't date my brother. He said he loved me ever since I first found him so for him … maybe I never was a brother … that's what really upset me. It's not like you and Romano. I know that you guys never really were brothers. You used to call him your henchman."

"I … I think … I think I might have in fact felt like you towards Romano. Like a brother, I mean."

Arthur looked at Antonio with questioning eyes.

"But you guys dated for years! I know you broke up but …"

"Romano was the one to confess. Frankly, before he did, I was like you. I hadn't even considered that idea. But when he confessed … I just couldn't refuse to that cute and worried face. I wanted him to be happy."

Arthur nodded slowly before taking another sip of whisky.

"You're very kind and strong. I could never have done that. In fact, I rejected Alfred."

Antonio watched Arthur attentively while he continued talking, his gaze wondering across the room.

"It just wouldn't feel right. It's not that I want to upset him … I wish I could have found a better way but … I can't deny my own feelings. I can't go out with someone half – heartedly. I just can't. I love Alfred but I will never be able to consider him as a lover. It's selfish, isn't it?"

"Not at all! I think you're stronger and kinder than I am. I broke Lovino's heart when I was trying to make him happy. I should have rejected him from the start and then he wouldn't have had such false hopes. I'm the worst. I was selfishly toying with Lovi's feelings and then I shattered them."

Arthur's gaze fell back onto Antonio who was staring at his glass. The Spaniard wore a sad, miserable and guilty expression on his face. Arthur couldn't help but lean forward and caress his cheek. He lifted Antonio's head up, making their eyes meet. A faint blush appeared on Antonio's cheeks.

"It's not your fault. You only did what you thought was right at the time. I'm sure Lovino was happy the short time he spent with you. I will never be able to give Alfred this kind of happiness. Unlike you … I have another motivation behind my actions."

Arthur dropped his hand and looked away, his eyes clouded with regret as he lifted his glass to his lips. Antonio waited for him to continue.

"I rejected Alfred because I only love him as my brother but there's a bigger reason to this. It was mostly because … I already love someone else. Someone who never even looks at me. This is silly but I just can't get that person out of my mind. I know there's no chance between us. I'm not his type."

"His?"

"Yeah … it's a man. Does it matter?"

"Not really."

Arthur sighs loudly while Antonio's heart tightens. He feels anxious again and tears are swelling up fast in his eyes but he holds them back and waits for Arthur to finish. Arthur serves himself another whisky and glances sadly at Antonio before sending him a small smile. Antonio's heart jumps in his chest and his face starts to heat up.

"I've loved him for so long now … centuries actually. If he really was interested in me, he would have shown it ages ago. I know he's a bit dense sometimes … ok, he's a complete idiot but … that's what I like about him. He makes me smile when I look at him. Sorry … I'm boring you with this …"

"Not at all. Please … continue."

Arthur looks at Antonio with surprised eyes before continuing.

"There's nothing else to say. I love him. He'll never love me back. He probably already likes someone else or he doesn't have anyone right now. Anyhow, I'm not on his list. It's painful but that's how it is. And that's why I can't go out with Alfred. Because I'm an idiot who can't get over his one – sided love! I'm quite pathetic, aren't I?"

"You're not! Don't say that! I think you're very strong! To be able to suffer like that without showing it and without causing pain to others! I … can't do that. I can't hold back my emotions and put up a strong face like you do."

"I don't think hiding your emotions behind a façade like I do is considered strong."

"Have you considered asking that person out?"

"That … would be very awkward. And it won't work anyway since I already know that there's no chance of success. He … was already in a relationship and frankly, I'm nothing like his ex."

"But how do you know without even trying?"

Arthur looked at Antonio thoughtfully before he sighed. He leaned closer towards the Spaniard and pressed his lips against Antonio's. He retreated almost instantly, with a sad smile on his face and he took another sip of his drink before saying:

"That's why."

Antonio was stunned. His face was bright red and he felt his heart banging against his chest like it was about to come out. His lips burnt from where they had made contact with Arthur's and he was literally hypnotised by the blond man. Slowly, Antonio raised his hand towards Arthur, took hold of his collar and pulled him into a long passionate kiss. Arthur was taken aback but he returned the kiss immediately, putting his glass down on the small table. Antonio lay down on the couch, pulling Arthur towards and over him. They still hadn't broken their kiss and Arthur was towering Antonio, while the brunet was running his fingers through his partner's golden locks. Finally they broke up to breathe and Arthur looked down at Antonio with a confused face. Antonio was smiling peacefully back at him, unable to contain his joy.

"Antonio? Why …? I don't want your pity! I don't want this to be like Romano …"

"It's not pity. I'm not doing what I did with Romano. I told you before that I broke his heart, right? You didn't ask why I broke it."

"Why …?" Arthur dared to whisper.

"I kissed him … while thinking that I was kissing you. I know I'm an oblivious idiot. And I know I should never have gone out with Roma. I know I should have noticed my feelings for you earlier but the truth is … I've loved you for centuries! I was just too scared to admit it and I rejected my feelings and forgot all about them. I'm sorry … I was just so scared that you'd leave me … I keep having those dreams where you walk away and far from me. I thought … without my armada … I was no longer worthy of you … I didn't mean to make you suffer for so long … I'm sorry … I didn't know …"

Antonio was interrupted by a forceful, lustful kiss. He rejoiced in the sweetness of it. That was so much better than with Lovi! That wasn't a weak, lovey dovey kiss. That was raw passion and Antonio dove into it. He started to unbutton Arthur's white shirt while Arthur was removing Antonio's own clothes. They broke apart and Arthur looked down on his lover with thankful eyes. Antonio could only admire him. With the sun light beaming from behind Arthur and creating a halo around him, his open shirt revealing his toned body, his green eyes sparkling with lust … he was beautiful. Arthur removed his shirt while Antonio did the same with his T – shirt. Arthur dived onto Antonio's neck like a hungry vampire and started to leave a trail of kisses and bite – marks. Antonio moaned. Lovi never did much biting … why not? Antonio bit back on Arthur's shoulder and smirked at hearing a surprised groan from the other. Arthur smirked as he then started to lick down on Antonio's chest. As he reached further down he started to remove Antonio's trouser and pants. Arthur nibbled on Antonio's nipple, making the Spaniard gasp and moan. Antonio didn't understand why but all the sex he had had with Lovi couldn't even compare to what he was feeling just now. And Arthur hadn't even touched him yet!

Arthur stopped. Antonio growled and looked up to see Arthur's serious face. What was wrong? Did he do something he shouldn't have? Why did Arthur stop?

"Antonio?"

"Yes …?"

"You said you only recently realised your feelings for me … why? How?"

Antonio hesitated before reaching up for a kiss and he whispered in Arthur's ear.

"I'm lucky to have a very insightful brother."

Arthur just looked at him in confusion but then shrugged, deciding that it wasn't important. With a smirk, he continued where he'd left of. Antonio grinned back and they kissed.

Many, many, many hours later, Antonio woke up in Arthur's bed … bed? How did they end up in bed? Weren't they on the couch? Oh, yeah, then they moved to the kitchen and then … the bedroom … uh … three bedrooms … before they ended in Arthur's bedroom last.

"Good morning sleepy head!"

Antonio swung his head over and gazed into the teasing emerald eyes before him. Arthur grinned and kissed his lover on the forehead and then on the lips.

"You looked so cute when you were asleep!" He said with a soft, deep voice.

"Arthur …"

"Hm? What is it, love?"

"I love you … I didn't say it yesterday … I love you."

Arthur looked taken aback but smiled fondly before whispering in Antonio's ear.

"And I love you too. Always have and always will."

"I'm sorry …"

"For what?"

"For keeping you waiting."

"It was worth the wait."

Antonio grinned one of his brightest smiles and hugged the island nation. They stayed in bed, kissing softly for almost an hour before Antonio's phone rang.

"Hello?"

"So? How was it with Arthur?"

"João! What are you …?"

"Well … I called your house and you weren't back so I figured you were still at Arthur's and now, judging from the panic in your voice, I'm guessing my instinct was right."

"Your … instinct …?"

"You had sex, right?"

Antonio blushed madly while Arthur was watching him, a bit confused.

"João! Please, stop meddling in my private life!"

"Sheeeesh! What a princess! And to think I did all this work for nothing! I thought you'd at least have the decency of thanking me! It is because of me that you figured out your fucking stupidity! You could have lost Arthur if I weren't there to keep you on the right track!"

"I … You're right. Thank you, João. Thank you so much. I love you, brother."

"… Whoa! That was creepy! Don't ever say that again! I really don't like it when you go all soft on me like that! I'm leaving this to Arthur! Well, just wanted to check on you guys! Have fun!"

Antonio heard his brother hang up and he felt Arthur's arms wrap themselves around his waist. Arthur rested his head on his lover's shoulder and kissed, sending shivers down Antonio's spine.

"What did João want?"

"Nothing. He wanted to make sure that his little plan had worked."

"What plan?"

"He convinced me to come and see you yesterday and in a way, it's also because of him that I was able to realise my feelings for you."

"So … he's like our cupid?"

"Yes … even if I'd rather have someone else than my annoying brother as my cupid!"

Arthur chuckled.

"You're being a bit harsh. João … always says nice things about you. He always tells me how much of a clueless idiot you are and that he has to keep an eye on you all the time. And he always sounds so happy and fond when he speaks about you. But he'll kill me if he discovers I told you that!"

Antonio laughed before kissing Arthur.

"Don't worry! I won't tell him what you said! Thank you, Arthur."

Antonio nuzzled into his lover's arms and sighs of content. This is the way it should be. It was just perfect! Why did it take him that long to be this happy?

"I love you …" Antonio whispered.

"I know. I love you too."

"I love you."

"Antonio, you already said that." Arthur chuckled.

Antonio looked up with a beaming smile and kissed him.

"And I'll say it again. I love you. I've wasted so much time … I'm so lucky you waited for me."

"I'm the lucky one that you did come to me."

"I love you. I love you. I love you."

"Are you programmed to say this repeatedly? Not that I'm complaining about it."

"I love you. I'll say it again and again to make up for the lost time. I love you."

"You don't have to. We have plenty of time ahead to make up."

"… I still love you."

"I know. I love you too."

Antonio inserts the key in and unlocks the coffin. As he opens it, he discovers the two missing pages from the album. Antonio looks at the pictures blankly. He feels his body getting aroused pretty fast but a small knowing smile spreads across his lips. All those pictures … he already didn't need them anymore. Antonio placed them back in the coffin along with the album but before closing it he notices not one but five hearts drawn next to each picture. One heart made by João while the other four … Antonio smiled and locked the coffin.


End file.
